Drying your hands when there aren't any paper...
zikau: I LAUGHED SO MUCH HARDER THAN NECESSARY. IT WAS MORE LIKE A WHEEZE.
partybarackisinthehousetonight: my grandma put a little piece of her birthday cake in the garbage can and i was like why the heck did you do that and she said “it’s important to leave some for the raccoons because what if it’s a raccoon’s birthday and no one remembers??”
loki-cat: that one time kim jong ill took kim jong un to disneyland
kingudamu: kumkardashian: imagine if they had movies but instead of actors they had real people and they filmed the story as it happened they have those its called a documentary
This is why we all HATE FACEBOOK →
spemis: chuu-kichi: hotdudesandjunkfoods: bubblyblond26: peity: alqdgs: swqale: lnary: sagg: pr2s: Seriously. I’m sure everyone agrees. Read more This makes me go Screw Facebook man AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO THINK THESE ARE FUNNY ^ yeah people still go to Facebook? lol Oh Facebook these are so stupid
nagaytokomaeda: proladykilla: nagaytokomaeda: will you vincent van gogh out with me how about vincent van no…… vincent van oh…..
maliciousmelons: yeah, i do push ups
end of essay: u feel me??
When your friends start mentioning stupid shit you...
slapstiq: And you’re like:
My life on a Saturday night
slapstiq: Expectations: Reality:
michaelphelpsvevo: *friendzones you at our wedding*
Reblog if you don't have a Tumblr.
jaredsgirl86: 0pal-heart: fakegalleryprincess: I don’t even have a computer. Okay, we got 3,943,048 little sarcastic assholes on here. 3,969.865
amoying: im so mad why aren’t toasters called tanning breads
majortvjunkie: it’s ok if you hate me as long as I hated you first
katkinkat: i swear celebrity pregnancies last like 2 months instead of 9???
mini-slashthegreat: thepreciousthing: adire-adire: victorysunshine: goldfish-kisses: geek-in-a-box: martiemcfly: WHY ARENT THERE ADULT-SIZED PLAYGROUNDS LIKE EVERYTHING IS THE SAME AS A KIDS PLAYGROUND BUT BIGGER WHY DO WE NOT HAVE THOSE theme parks. just. theme parks. but u have to pay for theme parks that’s the adult part son of a bitch ladies and gentlemen, behold ...
slapstiq: mom just got home i stormed out into the garage to meet her and yelled “BED EMPTY! NO NOTE! CAR GONE! YOU COULD HAVE DIED!” she looked so ashamed of herself
slapstiq: everyone is getting a boyfriend/girlfriend and you know what im getting FATTER
When your phone breaks
slapstiq: i’ve got 99 problems and they’re all due monday
lnfamy: dont you fucking talk shit about garlic bread